


Feeding Time

by Redcognito



Category: Vampire Diaries - L. J. Smith
Genre: Crack, Drabble, Gen, Pets, guinea pigs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-22
Updated: 2012-01-22
Packaged: 2017-10-29 23:08:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/325193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redcognito/pseuds/Redcognito
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stefan and Damon take care of Margaret's latest evil pet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Stefan

The guinea pig stared impassively at Stefan. Stefan stared warily back, clutching a wilted lettuce, vaguely wondering if it was safe to put his hands in the cage. Margaret's knack for choosing evil pets was now legendary, and he couldn't shake the nervous feeling that the dumb-looking pig might sprout fangs at any minute and make a flying leap for his jugular.

Gingerly, he opened the cage door, flung the lettuce in, and slammed the door shut again, taking barely enough time to make sure it was secure before snatching his fingers away. The pig stared at him for a moment longer, then suddenly attacked the greenery with a gusto that reminded Stefan of a pool of piranhas consuming flesh. He back-pedalled out of Margaret's room, grateful that the fluffball didn't seem interested in fresh blood, and made a firm resolution that Damon could feed the damn thing next time.


	2. Damon

"Hello, little pig," Damon began conversationally, crouching down at eye level with Margaret's guinea pig. "It might interest you to know that this," he waved his hand, "Is that hand that feeds you. Bite it, and you will become a vampy snack as I show you what a real bite is. Comprende?"

The guinea pig stared back it him gormlessly, and Damon found himself feeling slightly foolish for even bothering to have this ridiculous conversation. Stefan was obviously deluded, and it looked like it was starting to rub off on him now.

He scooped the little creature out of the cage, scratching it absently behind the ears. He felt a wave of pity for his younger brother. Five hundred years old, and afraid of a little rodent? That boy needed some serious help working through his issues. Damon grinned wickedly; he'd have some fun tormenting his brother to death first.


End file.
